The New Rules: Part 1 of Many

The following post is from my first ever guest blogger, the one and only Evan DeMarco. See what he has to say about texting and what he sees as the tragic death of personal connections. 


Thou Shalt Not Text

Many many years ago there was an amazing invention in the business world. It was the Skytel pager. A simple device by today’s standards- but a revolution for those of us wanting to stay in constant and CORRECT communication with co-workers, clients and prospects. The Skytel pager was the precursor to the texting revolution. By offering up a few pre-programmed commands like “In a meeting, call back soon,” or “will email that shortly,” or “be home in 30 minutes,” people across the world were able to communicate essential bits of information pertinent to day to day survival.

Fast Forward 15 years and now we are neck deep in the digital communication age, and quite frankly, it’s a shit show. Now before all you iPhone addicts go berating my observations as the defunct thinking of the some by-gone generation, let me introduce myself. My name is Evan DeMarco, I’m the CEO of a 45 year old sports nutrition company and I am 34 years old. I am a product of the Nintendo generation. I am a fan of technology and am as glued to my smart phone as most in this world will ever be. So where then does my intolerable hatred of the text message come from? Glad you asked.

Reason #1

The dating World – If one more of my single friends refers to a text message as a form of communication in getting to know a possible date, I’m going to scream.

Do any of these sound familiar?

I think he likes me- he sent me text right after we met.

He texted me about possibly hanging out next week.

He asked me to come over last night via text.

If some variation of one of these statements are something you have uttered recently, you are part of the problem. Does anyone remember the boiling frog analogy? Put a frog in a pot of boiling water and it will jump out. Put that same frog in a pot of cool water and slowly raise the temperature and the frog will sit there and boil to death. To many people are frogs in a pot slowly increasing in temperature. So many people don’t realize that they are in trouble, they think the status quo is the norm and completely acceptable. WRONG!

The essential process in getting to know someone, romantic or otherwise, cannot be done on tiny bits of information sent over data transmissions. It can only be done in the process of engaging someone in a real conversation, by asking probing questions, by actively listening to that person. It is only through this filtering process, a process which has taken a huge evolutionary step backwards in recent years, that we really get to understand people and determine whether or not they are worth spending any of our valuable time with.

Your challenge over the next week until part two of this series comes out – is to treat your phone like the Skytel pager and transition as many would be text conversations into actual conversations.

Respond to a text conversation with something like “I’m super busy right now but can I call you at 7 tonight?” You’ll find out real quick who your friends are when you take texting as a sole means of communication out of the equation. This is a good thing people. At the end of your life, are you going to look back and think, Gosh – I wish I would have had more text conversations?

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