A few ridiculous things I’ve come across this week.

Just thought I’d share these ridiculous things I’ve come across in the past few days. I shall not provide context for I feel they may be funnier without.

1. I saw my babies in her eyes, so I gave her a towel.

2. I was once with a girl I had slept with, and she was talking shit to me in front of her friends – so I told her that “since I turned your belly button into my dna’s swimming pool, you have no grounds for insults”

3. We’re all fat because everytime we bang your mom she makes us a sandwich

4. This. SharknadoΒ (which won’t embed for the life of me)

5. And this.
photo

6. “I am hungover a lot, so yeah, I have a lot of hats”

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